You should date a girl who thinks

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Date a girl who thinks. Find her in the library, with her books open and her eyes unfocused. Find her pensively quiet in the middle of a heated discussion in a lecture hall somewhere. Find her looking in your direction, into your eyes with a half smile. Approach her. Drop a witty line. She thinks you’re interesting. To a girl who thinks, everybody is interesting. Buy her a drink. Win her over with your clever words. She will study you from the corner of her eyes. If she smiles, offer to walk her home. Get her number. Don’t call her.

Ask her out with a simple text. A girl who thinks will appreciate it because a text allows her time to think, to consider the pros and cons, to try her best to decide your sincerity. In the end, she’ll say yes because it’s only a date. A girl who thinks has high expectations. Lower her expectations. Show up in your jeans and t-shirt. Don’t take her to a fancy restaurant. Take her to the park. Don’t discuss politics and Voltaire, ask for her opinions about nothing in particular. Listen to her. Give her meandering thoughts an outlet to untangle. If the depth of her thoughts makes it difficult for you to breath, be comfortable with it. If her thinking gives you the urge to run away, don’t. Stay. Make her laugh. Hold her hand. She may take it back. Reach for it again until she lets you. Kiss her. Pour your heart out for her. Repeat.

Ask her to marry you, at her place, with candles and flowers. A girl who thinks appreciates the privacy of intimacy. She wants to believe that your love is true with or without an audience. She asks for your assurance and says yes. Get married. Celebrate because you have won. She has lost.

She has lost because in the midst of it all, she fell for you. Treat her badly. Push her away. Stop loving her and she will still be at your side. A girl who thinks has a smart brain and a stupid heart. She will love you in the best and the worse of time. She will love you even when she knows she deserves better. She will give you her all because she thinks effort will earn it all. She will give you her all because she thinks love will fix it all.

Date a girl who thinks because unlike her thoughts, her heart is naive. But don’t fail her because one day, she may wake up and leave her heart behind.

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Quality time

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Meet me for coffee.

Let’s go for a bike ride.

Let’s go for a picnic. Feed each other food and you can nap on my lap.

Let’s take a walk.

If we must bring work home, let’s sit together and be productive. I’ll be your occasional distractions and you’ll be mine.

If it’s a long day, I’ll lean on you and tangle my fingers with yours.

Content.

Repeat in no particular orders.

Stay up

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“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them. Ships sink because of the water that gets in them.”

– someone awesome out there

A dream

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I live in a dream. I am aiming for things that are not there. I am reaching for goals that are not probable. I am loving someone who is not around. I am living with a family that does not want to stay together. I go to sleep to wake up unsatisfied. I walk the street not wanting to arrive at a destination. I work so life would pass by unnoticed.

Then the excuses come. Reality does not have to be real. Accomplishments need obstacles. Distance is the ultimate test for love. All happy families are the same. Sleep is an anecdote, not a solution. The desire to live has to be searched for. Life happens.

It’s time to wake up.

**I stumbled across this post in my draft bin. It was written in 2012 and somehow I forgot about it. What a curious feeling reading the words that was written years ago. I still feel like I am living in a dream, yet the dream and the uncertainty have changed and they may never go away.

No matter

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“No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, show up and never give up.”

– Anonymous 

Happily ever after

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“If the goal is to find the truth in love, to search for love that is real and enduring, then love cannot be left to fate.”

– Ty Tashiro

 

Don’t date a girl who travels

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She’s the one with the messy, unkempt hair colored by the sun. Her skin is now far from fair like it once was. Not even sun kissed. It’s burnt with multiple tan lines, wounds and bites here and there. But for every flaw on her skin, she has an interesting story to tell.

Don’t date a girl who travels. She is hard to please. The usual dinner-movie date at the mall will suck the life out of her. Her soul craves for new experiences and adventures. She will be unimpressed with your new car and your expensive watch. She would rather climb a rock or jump out of an airplane than hear you brag about it.

Don’t date a girl who travels because she will bug you to book a flight every time there’s an airline seat sale. She won’t party at Republiq. And she will never pay over $100 for Avicii because she knows that one weekend of clubbing is equivalent to one week somewhere far more exciting.

Chances are, she can’t hold a steady job. Or she’s probably daydreaming about quitting. She doesn’t want to keep working her ass off for someone else’s dream. She has her own and is working towards it. She is a freelancer. She makes money from designing, writing, photography or something that requires creativity and imagination. Don’t waste her time complaining about your boring job.

Don’t date a girl who travels. She might have wasted her college degree and switched careers entirely. She is now a dive instructor or a yoga teacher. She’s not sure when the next paycheck is coming. But she doesn’t work like a robot all day, she goes out and takes what life has to offer and challenges you to do the same.

Don’t date a girl who travels for she has chosen a life of uncertainty. She doesn’t have a plan or a permanent address. She goes with the flow and follows her heart. She dances to the beat of her own drum. She doesn’t wear a watch. Her days are ruled by the sun and the moon. When the waves are calling, life stops and she will be oblivious to everything else for a moment. But she has learned that the most important thing in life isn’t surfing.

Don’t date a girl who travels as she tends to speak her mind.
 She will never try to impress your parents or friends. She knows respect, but isn’t afraid to hold a debate about global issues or social responsibility.

She will never need you. She knows how to pitch a tent and screw her own fins without your help. She cooks well and doesn’t need you to pay for her meals. She is too independent and wont care whether you travel with her or not. She will forget to check in with you when she arrives at her destination. She’s busy living in the present. She talks to strangers. She will meet many interesting, like-minded people from around the world who share her passion and dreams. She will be bored with you.

So never date a girl who travels unless you can keep up with her. And if you unintentionally fall in love with one, don’t you dare keep her. Let her go.

– Adi Zarsadias 

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